Sunday, December 29, 2013

An Adoption Journey- or Are We There Yet?

First of all, I'm not sure I knew adoption would even be a journey.  There were some things I did know.    For all of her life Rae wanted to be a mom. I wasn't surprised by this as that was always my goal as well.  So, she became a mom by the typical route.  Sadly, immediately following that near text book perfect birth, things were anything but typical.
On the advice of her docs, she and Michael decided to pack their bags and head out on this adoption journey sooner than expected.
I knew she was a completely engaged and loving mother. I knew there are babies who desperately need that kind of mama.  So, let's get her done.
Whoa, not so fast. It just doesn't work that way.
 She opted to go domestic, as it seemed it would be less expensive than an international adoption with the chance of getting the baby soon after birth far greater.
 So my first bump in the journey was discovering that we have to attach a dollar sign to putting needy babies with good parents. And  while I am in complete agreement with home studies, drug tests, the whole nine yards, I can't get why in the world  it takes so very long?
Then, the way they do it. I don't get it. Usually now, you have to make a book, a family portfolio, all about yourself.  They call to tell you there is a potential child, and you submit your book, and wait.
I've been prayerful over several of those phone calls as I shared here. Over and over their book was submitted, but they weren't chosen and left with another heartbreak.
I can only imagine how hard this has been for her, because I know every time she's called, I've started making plans and dreaming about that baby.  I can't help it.
Then a different phone call, a private adoption, maybe.  This lawyer gets the problem with this passing out twenty portfolios to every perspective birth mother. Her words, "The cutest couple gets picked." So
she only submits one family to a birth mother and she was willing to submit Rae's family to a client, since she did not have a family willing to accept this wee one
 Doing it this way however comes with a price and a big one. 
So, another bump in the road, a big one indeed. 
 I've watched this couple live very differently than many people I know, wearing clothes till they fall apart, making their own detergent, lotion, toothpaste and shampoo, no vacations, no eating out, not doing much that requires money so all funds go the baby they desired.  Still, this is a ton of money.

32c28be0-cc31-4c63-9218-29bef327ee12_profile.jpg  You can read their story here.

The birth mother did pick them and plans are underway for us to fly out of here the last week of January and bring our new baby home.
A little girl baby, due on the very same day her Mama- to- be was due(what are the chances?), but arriving early due a scheduled c-section, very close to Mama-to-be's own birthday.
The journey isn't over, we aren't there yet.
So, we trust the Lord to provide for this littlest bit of a girl.
Thank you for your continued prayers, for everyone involved, including the birth mother.  It's been a wild ride, heavy on the emotional side,  but we hope we've arrived and

I can't wait till she's ours.

1 comment:

  1. What a difficult journey for them and for others in their situation. It really is like buying and selling them. I sure hope the struggles are over soon and all of you get to hold her. She is getting a wonderful family.