Give a Little Love- Caution, Wide Load, I Mean Long Post

I think in my circle of friend-girls, I'm the oddball. I don't love shoes. I think purses are a nuisance. I have a wee saphire and a gold band on my left hand and rings for my kids on my right. Except for pins, that's about sums up my jewels. Metal things clanging around on me make me feel anxious. If my hair had turned a pretty silver like my sisters, instead of a blah grey, it would never have seen color. I wear lipstick, oh maybe six times a year. My nails are just some nails and I ignore them. I cannot abide television. I would rather see a movie I love six times than risk seeing one I don't at all. I love books and I read like crazy. I don't think my husband can live without home cooked meals.

My dear old mama always said, "Birds of a feather, flock together." In this techno age, I can do just that. I love hooking up with folks, via the Internet, who love grandbabies, and chickens, knitting, and gnomes and wee folk and fairies and such.

I found a site called Natural Suburbia where people from all over share whatever interesting crafty thing their working on. I found Anna's website and fell in love with her little pocket gnomes.

My gramerlings love for me to tell them stories. I was trying to think of what to give them for Valentine's Day. All of that rolled into the idea of making a Pocket Lovey with a story. I wanted them to feel like they could carry my love around with them. Here is Miss Bugg's, and her story, hence the reason for such a long post. Yeah, my big thrills come from knitting tiniest winter caps.

Pocket Lovey story for Bugg

Once upon a time, in Gramerly Woods, in a humble Tumbledown Cottage, lived a fair and precocious princess named Lillian. This princess had bluest round eyes, rosey red cheeks, bounciest strawberry blonde curls with glints of gold that would reflect the warm sunshine, and a button nose.

Though more fit for a fine castle, she chose her humble Tumbledown Cottage so she could do what she loved best, spending time with friends and family, befriending all creatures great and small in Gramerly Woods. To those who loved her she was known as Lilli-Bugg, and she was much loved.

Her Gramerly loved the woods too, and would often accompany Princess Lilli-Bugg, but frequently reminded the wee child, that Gramerly Woods was no place for a princess without a grown-up close by.

The princess grew and by the fourth celebration of her birth day, felt old and wise in the ways of the woods.

One day, while being entertained by a dainty Lady Bug on a beautiful sunflower, her cousin Oliver strolled by. Lilli-bugg was surprised to see Oliver alone, as she was expecting her dearest friend and cousin, Annabelle, to accompany him.

“Oliver, Where is Annabelle?”

“Oh, she’s not feeling good today and my mom said she couldn’t come.”

What distressing news for the princess. Suddenly, she had an idea. She’d take the beautiful sunflower to Annabelle. Surely its sunny face would make Annabelle feel all better.

Carefully Lilli picked the sunflower, scooting Miss Lady Bug to another plant hosting tasty aphids for her Lady Bug lunch. She carefully wrapped the lovely flower in wet leaves to keep it moist and struck out for Annabelle’s, forgetting the wise Gramerly’s sage advice.

Though to some, the woods can be a frightening place, especially where the trees grow close, causing the sunlight to play hide and seek, to Lilii-Bugg it was an endless world of discovery. She noticed bark, and moss, and patterns and light. She remembered all the fun and exciting adventures she had here with her cousins and her friends. She wasn’t expecting to hear an unfriendly growl in the midst of her woods. She stopped short, thinking that surely she’d imagined it. Then a louder growl and swiftly turning in the direction of the noise found herself mere feet from the biggest black bear she’d ever seen.

She opened her mouth to scream when a tiny voice said, “Jump through this brush.” Now the princess knew she was crazy. Why would you jump into that prickly brush? But having no other good alternative, jump she did, and though scratched up a bit , she could see a small hole, just her size in the side of the hill and quickly backed herself into it. The bear was now growling fiercely, but she was able to back out of harm’s reach. Trembling she waited, not knowing how to convince that bear to move on. Peering from her little earthen hole, she noticed the bear losing interest in her. Ahh, there was the reason for the bear’s angst, a baby bear. Once the mama found her little one, she lumbered away.

“Whew, that was a close call,” came the tiny voice again. Lilli-Bugg looked around, but saw no one. She scampered out of the hidey-hole and rocked her head for side to side, to clear it, she hoped.

“Oh my, is there something in your ear?”

Lilli Bugg realized the sound was coming out of her dress pocket. Slowly she reached in and pulled out a tiny creature only three inches tall. A round face, with no features, a cotton candy pink hat and scarf, held together with a tiniest Lady Bug, in the palest green ovie alls.

“Well, hello there. Who are you?”

“My name is Mintberry.”

“My name is Lilli-Bugg.”

“Oh, I know your name, I’ve always known it.”

“You have? “ “ How in the world did you come to be in my dress pocket and how did you know about that hidey-hole?”

“Oh, the hidey-hole is easy, I know everything your Gramerly knows about these woods.” “ How I came to be in your pocket, is harder to explain.” “ I’m not sure I understand it all myself.”

Intrigued, Lilli- Bugg exclaimed, “ I’m listening.”

“Well, so I’m told, when you human folk have a little baby, you love it fiercely. So much so as a matter of fact, you don’t think you could ever love anything more. Then those babies grow up and have a baby. That’s how your Gramerly got you right?”

Lilli-Bugg nodded. “Well, your Gramerly found out that maybe, if it’s possible, she loved you even more.” “ She surely doesn’t want a drop of that big love to go to waste, so she squeezes some of it into a little pocket lovey like me. That way, that big love can slip right into your pocket. Anytime your afraid, sad or lonely, you can hold me close and all that love will fill up your heart.” “Though I still don’t think it’s such a great idea to be in these woods by yourself.

Lilli-Bugg laughed. “ I guess I’m not quite as grown-up as I thought.

Mintberry said, “ I think your Gramerly would say to be patient, it will come soon enough.”

“Thank you, Mintberry, for saving me from that bear.”

“Well, I’d like to take the credit, but the thoughts were really your Gramerly’s and a memory you had of when she showed that hiding place last winter before the summer vines took it over.”

“Still,” said Lilli-Bugg softly, as she gently placed Mintberry in her pocket, “ I think you are a perfect friend for times like these.” “ I can’t wait to show you to Annabelle, but I’ll return home and find someone to accompany me.”

“Your Gramerly was right,” came the voice from her pocket, “ you are bright and beautiful!

This post is part of the February blog carnival hosted by the Parenting/Family Channel on About.com. If you have a blog, you are invited to join in. For details, see the blog carnival invitation posted by Katherine Lee, Guide to Child Parenting, our host.

The Gate

Isn't this a pretty gate? I had various ones of those plastic models, and they drove me to drink. Instead of always opening them, I'd try to step over them sometimes, to you know, save time. Except one time, I failed badly in my attempt and went sailing over and landed on the floor. There's a lot of me to land, and it wasn't pretty. So I pleaded with Handy Man to come up with something that was altogether lovelier and not so deadly. He did an awesome job, huh? That piece on the top just slides over to open, and back to shut. They lift off when you need to move it.

I need to move it.

I have a gate because at some point Addie-girl decided that leaving the kitchen/familyroom to go into another area of the house amounted to same thing as going outside. Then, little treasures were found in various places about the house. Handy Man, not being an inside dog man, was not amused.

It was so strange to come in Wednesday and close the gate behind me, only to realize there is no longer a need. Ahh, more tears. I feel like my eyeballs have been rolled in sand.

Why did I love you Addie-girl? Well, the one and only thing you ever wanted was to be where ever I was at. You never got tired of me, even when you really knew me. Even if I wasn't patient, or kind, or willing to play. I didn't even have to hold you, just be present. I'm amazed you never veered from that in fourteen years. You always loved to lay beside me, you never really liked snuggling. Even still you let me hold you like a baby for over an hour on Tuesday.

You were devoted, you kept me company and I wonder how long will I wake up and wonder about you, how long will I walk in and look for you, how many times will I go to check your water? Just wondering.

Just Mourning Today

I guess I'm a no good, terrible dog owner, because I couldn't do it. I couldn't even make the appointment. I called Handy Man at lunch and said, " I can't do this." He said he'd take care of it and made the appointment for 4:00.

Little Addie-girl had other plans and when he came home she was already gone, curled up in her bed.

Thank you Jesus for blessings great and small. I am so relieved that if it had to happen, it happened that way. At the same time, well, broken hearted.

Happy Dance /Mourning Song

Yes, a Happy Dance this morning when I was able to accompany my daughter to her 28 week ultrasound. The last time I attended an ultrasound was Jakee's and he's nineteen. Together we learned that we are expecting a boy. He will be named Gideon. Ol' Mother Hubbard was ready with a beautiful crib set- for a girl. Rae-rae is looking at this set for Gideon. I love the little forest animals. It will be fun and dangerous to now know what we're expecting. Too much cuteness out there for baby boys.

My faithful friend Gardener E, took over my classroom this morning so I could go.

What do you see nestled in the back corner of this picture? My pooch, Galadriel, though we've always called her Addie. She's never been a lap dog, but has always been happiest wherever I am. She was fourteen in November and has become hard of hearing and seeing. Then she developed a cancerous tumor. Things have gotten progressively worse and today I put a call into the vet. Let's just suffice it to say that today has been awful, with worse symptoms then I anticipated. When we got home Handy Man dealt with the floor, while I bathed her and laundered her bed. I wrapped her in a towel and sat with her in front of the heater while her bed was drying. She has not eaten for had anything to drink today. My heartfelt prayer would be for her to go to sleep in that cozy bed and not wake-up. It's just awful.

I'm glad the week started with a good distraction, as the rest of this week appears to be going downhill fast.

Good Bye for Now

Sweet D's mama died peacefully in her sleep this morning. So sad for the loss, yet relieved that she is no longer hurting and confused. Prayers continue for all.

Where Were You?

Where were you this morning twenty-eight years ago?

Well, at this very moment ( 10 am) I was in transition and yelling at Handy Man that this was going to be a repeat of the no good, awful, terrible experience I had the last time. As the remaining color drained from his face, they ushered him out and my new BF (God's Gift to Women and Handy Men) in, the anesthesiologist. When Handy Man returned, I was sitting up in bed, smiling, ready to get the show on the road. Outside, conditions were more deplorable than they are today in Southern Indiana. Everything was coated in ice, trees were falling, electric was out, but by noon, 11:55 and 11:58 to be exact, all was right with my world when they put a little pink bundle in my right arm and blue bundle in my left. Drummer boy, 6.14 and Rae-rae 7.1.

I remember just staring at them, incredulous that my body produced them, that they fit in there. It was a miracle.

1st Lt. was not yet two and when people would ask what mommy had, his reply was always, "scissors(sisters)."

The next question, "What did she name them?"

"Waychel."

"Well, what did she name the other one."

With a tone that indicated his frustration with their stupidity, he replied, "Waychel."

To me, they are still a miracle, still as beautiful and precious. I'm still incredulous.

How did those little pastel bundles already get so old with bundles or bundles to be of their own? Just a miracle I guess.

Happy Birthday Drummer Boy and Rae-rae!

Lots of Sad

Isn't there a lot of sad in world?
My school kids and I adopted some folk enduring the rigors of cancer treatment this year. We send notes and cards and pray for them everyday. We started with four and now the list is six.
Ahh, heartbreaking. That's just cancer.
This past weekend I made my annual trek to Brown County with some girls. We call this group Bunco, though a die hasn't been cast in many a year, we've held tight to the name.
Someone was missing and we missed her.
Her husband I 've talked of before- Big D. Plans are underway for a stem cell transplant for him this spring. That in itself is huge and overwhelming, but her elderly mama has suffered a series of strokes and is not doing well. I've walked this walk, of life being moment to moment, crisis to crisis, crushing fears, hearts filled, broken, depleted. It is so awful and so huge.
Praise the Lord, He sends you a few people who saddle up for a long hard ride and make the effort to lift you up. It's hard to help people in this place, because when you're in it, you don't have enough brain cells to tell them what you need. I've found that there's a lot of people you consider friends, who, when not knowing what to do, do nothing. Ongoing illness can be a lonely place.
You can text, leave a message, send a card, drop a treat, go sit and hold a hand. Pray, pray, pray and let them know you are praying and that they aren't forgotten.
When someone you love life is in a compromised situation you carry that around like a hundred pound pack on your back and you can't take it off. Come along side and give some support to that person in your life.
I know your list is long too, but continued prayers for Big D's transplant, mama Lilly and Sweet D who is trying to keep all her plates spinning would be appreciated.