Saturday, December 17, 2011

Christmas Kitchen Treachery

Notice anything interesting here? First, the stove is off, secondly, it is on my side porch, further adding to "Welome to the Squatly's" persona of my side porch.
My stove blew-up, with my meatloaf supper inside it's bowels. "Well duh," you might way, just get it out. Oh no, it couldn't completely explode, just explode enough to scare me half to death whilst I was stirring the sauce. Just enough to do that and cause it's little stovie brain to be temporarily recircuited, believing me to have wished it to clean itself and thereby locking the oven door!
"Give me my meatloaf!" Rude.
Well, Handy Man eventually wrangled it free. Thankfully, it was already nearly done.
Why, why do my appliances insist on going out at the holidays? Why can't the oven blow-up in the dead of August when I don't want to cook anyway. Why can't the frig bid us a farewell in February, when all food can be safely stored on the back porch? Oh no. It has to be Thanksgiving or Easter, and now Christmas.
My Christmas dinner with my kids is tomorrow. Though my sad sack self wasn't too zealous at doing anything big, I was hoping for something a bit more than carry out pizza.
Such times cause people to make hasty decisions, like sending their husbands to check out stoves. He didn't just check them out, he brought one home. It only has one big burner. Umm, what is up with that? What is the purpose of all those little burners? I use one for tea or to melt butter, that's it. I'm a big burner kinda of cook. Oh, and no clock, forget a timer. Honey, we're only one step above his coal cookstove.
Yes, I suppose I'm being ungrateful, but I spend a lot of time with my stove. Oh well.

It works thankfully. I still had a batch of fudge and caramel to make last night. I wondered to Phil if I hold some sort of record for repeated years of mailing candy to a friend.
Marie was my maid -of-honor. She always came over for Christmas dinner and I always made her fudge and caramels. She has long since moved to far off New Jersey, but I send them each year just the same. Likewise, every year I get a note that quotes her oldest, "It's not Christmas until the caramels get here." So, the Christmas candy will soon be on it's way. Same recipes I've used for over thirty years. Only now I add the tiniest bit of flaked sea salt in the caramel pan. It gives such a big burst of caramel flavor.
We get our beef from a local farmer. I ask for the soup bones and cook them up for the chickie girls and pooch, as well as for soup. I have wanted to make French Onion Soup for a very long time. Well, today was the day. Wow, it takes hours to carmelize all those onions.
I'm still reducing the beef broth and then it will be all done and ready to top with a toasted baguette and cheese for our Christmas dinner tomorrow. I'll also be making cream of mushroom. Good thing I made the onion today, since, you know, only one big burner.


  1. All that homemade soup sounds so good. I love onion soup. I have plans to make potato soup for Christmas Eve. My mother used to do that or even make oyster stew (all my family except my brother would never go for that). I love good soup, but except for beef vegetable and noodles with chicken broth, I don't feel like I do it right. Stoves last a long time. Maybe after the holidays, you could trade it in for one with more big burners and a clock. I don't think you are ungrateful to want those amenities! You are a good friend with the caramels! Merry Christmas to you and your beautiful family.

  2. I bet it smells just wonderful at your house!

    Merry Christmas Gramerly! May 2012 bring you lots of happiness and a little less stress.

  3. Your Christmas sounds delicious! It takes more than an exploding stove to stop Gramerly!